Monday, July 30, 2007

FInally back to Civilization!!

Whew, Finally back from the anual trek to SW Missouri. This state has always been 20 years behind the rest of the US. I realized this when I started living there about 1989. They were stuck in 1969! Nothing open past 9 pm. Nothing open on Sunday. The Walmart was open on Sunday's but closed by 5 pm. Talk about culture shock. I come from the NW and Fred Meyers, which had the concept of "one stop shopping" long before Walmart did, was open 24 hrs. If the element in your water heater went on the fritz you could get a new one, anytime! 7 days a week, 24 hrs a day. I'm telling you, 20 years behind!! I said all that to get to this. When I am in Missouri, I can't just get my laptop, fire it up, and log on the internet through my wireless card at my in-laws house. Wireless card? what is that? some kind of Witchcraft?!! They get maybe, and I mean MAYBE, 26K on their dial-up! That is like waiting 2 minutes for a page to load up, and if there are pictures, buddy, you might as well go mow the 2 acre front lawn and then it might be loaded up! So I have to trek into town, 7 miles, and try and find a WI-FI hotspot. Of course I have the computer genius of a Brother-in-law, I really mean that, but for some reason I can't send any e-mails at his place, recieve them fine, sending NO! So I drive around, find the local Java Dave's, trying desperatly to be a Starbucks, and ask them if they have WI-FI.

The lady behind the counter looks at me and says, "We sell coffee here."

AHHHHHHHHHHG!!

Then the owner comes out from the back and says, "Why yes we have Wi-FI we just got it last week." she said this like everyone in the world got it last week.

Where is the duct tape when you need it. I sure wish Wyatt wouldn't hog it all!! So now that I am in a civilized place, and I have washed all the redneck cooties off. Especially, those I got from coverting with my friends from SW Kansas. Speaking of them. If you like bluegrass music, go to their website, Lynette has grey hair , I don't know if that's true or not, but I bet it gets a rise out of her! heh!! Go check them out. Someday they is goin' to be famous!!

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

HA HA HA HA HA HA

No, I'm not laughing at RT! Just laughing with RT! Heh!

Here is a, oh btw RT, I was just joking, I needed to start this out somehow. And you were a perfect fit. Where was I, Oh yeah, here is a funny for your humor in the doldrums of the middle of the week. Easy for you to say!

A doctor at an insane asylum decided to take his patients to a baseball game. For weeks in advance, he coached his patients to respond to his commands.
When the day of the game arrived. Everything went quite well. As the National Anthem started, the doctor yelled, "Up Nuts", and the patients complied by standing up.
After the anthem, he yelled, "Down Nuts", and they all sat back down in their seats.
After a home run was hit, the doctor yelled, "Cheer Nuts". They all broke out into applause and cheered.
When the umpire made a particularly bad call against the star of the home team, the Doctor yelled, "Booooo Nuts" and they all started booing and cat calling.
Comfortable with their response, the doctor decided to go get a pepsi and a hot dog, leaving his assistant in charge.
When he returned, there was a riot in progress.
Finding his tizzied assistant, the doctor asked, " What in the world happened?" The assistant replied, "Well everything was going just fine until this guy walked by and yelled,

"PEANUTS!"

Friday, July 06, 2007

Yes, Yes I have been on the road again!



I just feel awful about not posting much anymore. I just looked and I think I have posted like 6 times since the end of March. That is just pitiful! I do stand behind all the excuses again though! Too busy, yada yada yada! This last trip I went to Gillette, WY. I got to bring my wife with me! Whoo Hooo! She kept me busy, so I couldn't blog, if you know what I mean. :) ! Let me tell you something here. There is nothing, and I mean N. O. T. H. I. N. G. in Gillette, WY! I thought Minot, ND was bad! They were heavy on the Fast food side, very short on the sit down and order your food side. They had 1 national chain restaurant. It was an Applebees. Now don't go getting excited now. This wasn't the Applebees you see on the commercials, or even the one you have at home. This one specialized in teh good, teh bad, and teh retarded. The good was that we could leave and never had to go back, the bad was the service you received, the retarded were the help that worked in this restaurant. This restaurant was the talk of the show. It wasn't just us. It seemed every time someone went to this restaurant they just had completely bad service. There were 4 adults and 2 children. My wife and I, Pinhead and his wife, and their 2 children. We get seated and commence to waiting. It took 15 minutes to get our waitress to come by the table. Another 15 minutes for her to bring us our drinks. And it wasn't like she was overworked. She had 4 tables to take care of. The table behind us had finally received their food, all except on person there. He didn't get his food until his table was completely done eating. The waitress walked by them 3 or 4 times without even acknowledging that he was still missing his food. In the meantime, we are still waiting for our food. It's been an hour. While we were waiting, a couple came in and sat down across the isle from us. We tried to warn them but they just wouldn't listen. So they order GRILLED chicken salads. About 30 minutes later, out comes a woman with FRIED chicken salads. She sets the plates down and the man says, "Um, we ordered grilled chicken on our salad" And I kid you not. This woman looks him straight in the eye and says, "This IS grilled chicken" They just looked at her with these, "you have got to be kidding me eyes", and she just walks away. I couldn't believe it. The chicken was breaded and fried. We told him to just eat it and be happy! HA! Finally, we get our food, after an hour and a half. Needless to say, the manager was walking around giving away free food. I think they need to burn that place down and re-build and start all over again!



We did get to go to Mt. Rushmore and Devils Tower. That was pretty cool. I didn't realize how beautiful SW South Dakota was. Man that is one well kept secret. It is beautiful down there. If you ever get the chance. Do it! Here are some pics from our trip.


This is an old church out in the middle of nowhere, near Devils Tower. It was old enough, that if you needed to go to the restroom you had to use these:


These were off to the right side of the church. No wonder parents said you had to go to the bathroom before church and not during church. They might never come back! HA!
The park rangers were working on something, up on top of Mt Rushmore. I think they were trying to part Jeffersons hair just right!



There was a sighting of a Sasquatch. I didn't see anything though!

This is just one beautiful sunset. This turned out to be a cool thunderstorm! It was a great trip! And I loved taking my wife with me. That was awesome. But, really, Gillette is not a destination, just a passing through point in your future vacations! Trust me on this one!